i love the iPhone = i love my wife
a few weeks ago, our friend Dave Gibbons reiterated a comment he had made before about how if we (married) men treat our wives the way we treat our iPhones, we would have awesome marriages. i may have thought, “how dare he! doesn’t he know I’m up for the ‘Husband of the Year’ award in my household? my iPhone comes in a distant 2nd place to my family!” yet, the more i think about it, the more he is utterly correct and once again, I have been virtually slapped in the face. these are the ways I love my iPhone and obviously, these are the ways I need to love my wife:
1. With Quality Time
I’ve tweeted this many times before but ever since I got my iPhone over 2 years ago, I’ve become a much more patient man. There are days when I will purposely choose the longest line at Costco, just so I could spend more quality time on my iPhone. There aren’t enough hours in a day to update my Facebook status, play my turn on Words with Friends, see what @RyanSeacrest is up to on twitter, read up on the latest Yelp review, and see what new emails came into the inbox within the last 5 minutes, so any time I have a chance to give my undivided attention to my beloved phone, I will do it. Hmmmm…
2. With Protection
Let me jump in quickly here before any of you have any funny ideas about what I mean with heading number 2. I have the 3Gs right now and upon my purchase of the latest, I also needed to buy a new case for the phone. (Apple and the 3rd party companies responsible for making these cases and protective shields are making an absolute killing.) I’m investing a lot to make sure that my phone is in tip-top shape and if there’s a time I drop the phone or “hurt” it, it absolutely kills me and just about makes me very angry. If any one ever insults my phone or does anything to inflict pain on it, they would have to answer to me and risk personal injury. There’s a very real need for preventative protection and maintenance and I’m doing it with my phone… now, am i providing this for my wife?
3. With Scheduled Updates
New firmware updates come around every few weeks with major ones coming about every few months. When this happens, it doesn’t matter who’s pinging me or what song title I need to find out with Shazam– my iPhone is going to get the update it needs and new features are going to be added. I don’t care that it will take hours to backup my iPhone or that the syncing process takes a little more time. It needs to happen and though it’s a (relatively) long process, I know it’s going to be worth it in the end and it needs to happen. I suppose I need to make sure that I’m taking the scheduled time out with my wife (date nights!) to make sure we’re updating each other, syncing (getting on the same page) and working through issues to make sure the calibration is complete. Of course new updates will constantly be rolling out and improvements will be made so our “work” is never complete!
4. With Words of Praise
I am not one to hold back the plethora of superlatives I have for the iPhone. I have said on numerous occasions how it has changed my life and how I could never go back to anything else. I may have even said “I love you” to it when my wife wasn’t looking. It’s also easy for me to talk about the latest feature of the iPhone with fellow iPhone lovers and slap hands knowing we’ve got it good. OK, enough about that… this is getting way too applicable and obvious…
5. With Commitment
There was a time when the iPhone didn’t allow 3rd-party apps. All it offered was Safari internet, Youtube, and iPod functions. It was enough for us. However, somewhere along the line, we thought we deserved more. We wanted 3rd party apps, and then we wanted picture/media text messaging. We wanted push notifications so that we could be alerted when we received new @ replies on twitter or new instant messsages on AIM. Need I remind you, it wasn’t too long ago when we didn’t have copy/paste capabilities or a grand search function. In the early iPhone days, did we ditch out and revert back to our Nokia 5190’s just because we didn’t have a built-in GPS? (Now we do… booyah!) No! We stuck around because the iPhone was still awesome and it was the best thing we had going. We forget this sometimes. Though the iPhone wasn’t EVERYTHING we wanted in a phone, we stuck around because we knew better days were ahead. We believed in a better iPhone and even if the updates didn’t come right away, we were in this to win this… we were ready to lay down our lives for a better day… ok, let’s say i’m explicitly talking about our marriages now because otherwise, this is getting scary, right?
Our marriages are far from perfect but God knows, we gotta stick it out or we’re going to miss out on some pretty cool stuff. We can’t just ditch out because some other chick has a better map with nationwide coverage or because some sexy robot named DROID is promising a better experience. We chose the iPhone because it was right for us and when we signed that 2 year contract and we continue to renew that sucker year after year, we are saying LOVE is a commitment and we won’t let anything tell us otherwise. I love you, SADIE!
*Disclaimer – these are my views only and don’t represent that of Apple or AT&T… although they should now pay me dearly for linking them to eternal love. I acknowledge this is a very flawed analogy but I hope you fellow iPhone freaks get the idea…*