can you handle MY uncertainty?
i just read this great post by my friend Mike Foster over at People of the Second Chance. He talks about how we all love to hear and share stories with perfect, beautiful endings but the truth is that life is almost never that way. i completely agree.
i’m in the middle of a pretty ridiculous, crazy, and (some may say) foolish journey and one of the hardest parts of being in this place has been my inability to give people solid, cherry-on-top answers to their question of “so, what’s next for you?” A lot of the times, my answer has been “I don’t know” or “we’ll see in a couple months” or “shut up and stop asking me that” (I’ve actually never answered in that matter nor will I ever so feel free to ask away!). it’s been very disheartening when some people (not everyone) respond to my response with a look of bewilderment and pity.
as a result, it’s been really difficult at times to resist giving the Hollywood-ending answers to all questions that come my way. i’d rather people celebrate with me than be disappointed or stressed about my situation.
on the flip side, i know that it is difficult for me to handle bad news or hear of difficult processes that people are going through as well.
i think this is all rooted in our tendency toward self: “Your bad news makes ME feel uncomfortable. I will wait till the end of this conversation when you say ‘hey! it’s all good. i’ll be fine’ and then I’ll breathe my sigh of relief”
i don’t think there’s such a thing as a Hollywood ending, but I do believe in Hollywood moments. I can share with you the incredible blessing I am experiencing at this time, knowing fully well that I’m still going to experience some major crap, too. my life isn’t perfect but that doesn’t mean i can’t marinade in small victories and even brag about new opportunities that mean a lot to me.
i think it’s an important art to be real in our pain while recognizing and celebrating the good. it’s also equally important to be able to journey alongside one’s hardship and be ok with another’s uncertainty. just let each other know you’re sticking around no matter what.